More than "Good Citizens"

"You're such a good person for working with those kids, mentoring them, and teaching them how to be 'good citizens'". I hear this kind of thing all the time from people that don't understand why I'm in youth ministry. I get really frustrated that people see what I do like this. If all I'm doing is helping to produce good, moral, citizens, then I've missed the mark completely.

I was meeting with one of our girls small group leaders a few weeks ago and she asked me about my vision for our small group ministry. I thought about it for a minute, and responded. I want our students to be captivated by the heart of their creator. I want them to be more than just good citizens. I want them to be more than just moral people. I want tham to be more than the good kids at school. There is so much more that I pray for and desire for them. I see such great potential in our middle school students. I believe that God has more in mind for this next generation of Christ followers. I desire for them to be radically changed by God. I desire that their actions are determined by a heart that is passionately drawn to God's heart. I want to see them do things for the kingdom of God that I can't even imagine.

All of this makes me think about the song "Hosanna" by Hillsong United that say:
I see a generation,
rising up to take their place,
with selfless faith, with selfless faith

I see a near revival,
stirring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees

When I hear these lyrics, it makes me want to pull everyone into our middle school room on a Sunday morning and tell them to look at the next generation. These are the next kingdom workers. These are the people that will carry on the faith of Christ to the generation after them. Our students will be the ones who could start great movement and revival in the world. Such great potential!

What our middle school ministry volunteers do is more than just producing "good citizens". Their job in our ministry is so much more than that. We are more than just mentors, we are examples of Christ followers. We have been given the task to equip our students so they do not believe everything the world trys to throw at them. The world very much tells us that if you make good grades, don't get caught, go to church, don't cuss too often, and do some charitable work here and there, you're a good person, and you'll go to heaven. Wow! I hope that's not the message we are teaching.

moving forward....

I definitely think that God uses music to speak to me. He affirms what I'm reading in scripture, and the things that I go through during my day. It may be because I go a million miles per hour during the day, and I usually spend at least an hour in my car with the radio on. I guess I'm a captive audience in my car. I wish I was more obedient to sit and listen in the quiet and wait upon the Lord, but I if chooses to use song lyrics, I'll take it!

I don't want to be in a place where I'm not pressing forward in my walk with Christ. I always want to be wanting more of Him and his character. I know it won't constantly be this way everyday of the week, because there are days when I breeze through my day just trying to get things off my To Do list. I want this to be the same with my relationships with the people in my life. I want to be going deeper. I want to know more of who they are, their desires, their passions.

I'm at a place in my life where God is showing me the different and new ways he wants to use me. I feel like I am truly understanding why God brought me to serve in middle school ministry. I'm settling into my role and seeing how God's timing is perfect. It feels like a new and exciting season for me. God has put me in situations in the past months, that a year ago, I would not have been willing to deal with. The conversations have been hard, the situations difficult, but God has baby stepped me through every single one of them. I am so grateful for His faithfulness in my life! I am thankful for the times of waiting, refining, and tears. You never can imagine what is on the other side of all the pain until you get there. My life has not be completely perfected by any means, but I love the deeper places God has brought me to.

I feel like the lyrics of the song "Moving Forward" by Israel Houghton resonate with me.

What a moment You have brought me to.
Such a freedom I have found in You.
You're the healer who makes all things new.
Yeah, yeah, yeah!

I'm not going back, I'm moving ahead.
I'm here to declare to you my past is over.
In You all things are made new. Surrendered
My Life to Christ. I'm Moving, Moving Forward.

You have risen with all power in Your hand.
You have given me a second chance.
Hallelujah, hallelujah!

I'm not going back, I'm moving ahead.
I'm here to declare to you my past is over.
In You all things are made new. Surrendered
My Life to Christ. I'm Moving, Moving Forward.

You make all Things new.
Yes, you make all things new and I will Follow You forward.

I will follow you forward.....

I'm not going back. I'm moving forward in all places in my life. My relationship with Christ, my friendships, Christ ministry through me- they are all moving forward. He truly makes ALL things new! I am beyond grateful for that! Praise the Lord for the restoration he brings, the healing that's in his hand, and the way he uses such a broken vessel to do his work.

I stink at blogging!

I'm not sure how long I've had this blog, but this is only my second post. Sad! This is going to be a random post of updates and thoughts!

First off, I love Sundays! Watching football all Sunday after church has become my new favorite thing. I am an Indianapolis Colts fan of course(I make my Dad proud). Even if my colts aren't playing, I enjoy a good game of NFL football. With that said, it's playoff time and that warms my heart! All the intense moments, come backs in the fourth quarter, and upsets are a great way to spend an afternoon! I don't remember ever being this into football. Besides my time out to go work out, I have been watching football all day.

Enough about that! Tomorrow I will be starting my new job, my dream job as I like to refer to it! I will be working at Fellowship Church here in K-town in Student Ministries as the Middle School Girls Director! What an amazing opportunity I have been given to do what I love, disciple teen age girls and encourage volunteers in the middle school ministry. The Lord is so good and faithful to provide another place where I can be used in this way. Tomorrow morning I will be hitting the ground running. I need to set up shop in the new office that has been freshly painted, and get to work on the girls retreat and on Sunday morning teaching on prayer.

Wayne is really excited for this new season for me and for us. I could not ask for a more supportive husband and best friend! He truly wants me to do whatever the Lord has placed in my heart to do, and for me, girls ministry is it! He will probably leave this week for another trip to Mexico for work. I would love for him to stay home longer b/c I have enjoyed having him home since before Christmas, but I think he may go crazy if he doesn't have something to do other than going into the office and working at a desk 5 days a week.

We had a great Christmas at home with my family. I hate that he didn't get to spend Christmas with his family in Memphis. I'm not sure how to balance the holidays with our families so spread out. We would be exhausted if we tried to see everyone, but we really do want to spend time with both sides. It's a harder adjustment than I thought it would be.

On a lighter note, I got a Kindle for CHristmas! I have been reading a lot more lately! I love that you can instantly download sample chapters of books you might want to buy. I've tossed around the idea of teaching on a Sunday morning with my Kindle edition of the NIV bible. Possibility of getting made fun of...... likely. I've been reading a book about the Holy Spirit by Francis Chan. It's been a good easy read with some good challenging thoughts. We'll see what book is next on my list.

I wanted to end this long and rambling entry, by telling you about my new found love of Jazzercise! Go ahead, point, laugh, and make fun all you want. I want to clear up some common misconceptions about jazzercise.

1. Leg warmers are not required

2. Most jazzercisers don't wear sweat bands...but some still carry on strong in that fashion statement.

3. Leotards have not made a come back in the jazz world.

I really do enjoy it! I have been going as much as I can to work out. I get to sing and work out at the same time. Maybe my show choir background has something to do with my new found workout. Anyways...I dare you to try it! That's all for now....Hopefully it won't be such a long time in between posts this time. We shall see!

I've always wanted to do this!

I've always wanted to have a blog of my own, but have always been to scared to give it a whirl. There have been so many changes in my life over the past year, that this seemed like a great time to try my hand at writing. Here goes nothing.......

Over the past months, it has been my prayer that God would give me a new song to sing, a fresh start. I have been praying that He would give me a new heart, and new eyes to see my life, my circumstances, and the people all around me. It's been a hard prayer to pray, because the changes the Lord wants to make in me are hard to accept. It's not a new prayer for me to pray, because I am constantly wanting the Lord to grow me and shape me. The familiarity doesn't make the changes any easier or better.

I have been told by several people over the years that I should give myself lots of grace in hard or new situations. I believe I have been getting better at this, or else I would like to think so. I have changed jobs 3 times in the last year, moved 2 times, and gone from dating, to engaged, to married all in this past year. I am beginning to think that change and adjustment are my middle names. I've had many of hardest situations and conversations in the past year also. On the same note, I have cried more in the past year than I can ever recall. God has brought me through all of this.

I am now left with the opportunity to evaluate, start over, and rebuild. This is when I am asking the Lord to put a new song in my mouth. I am asking Him to give me a vision and purpose for what my life is to be about. I keep praying that I would be a blank canvas for Him to use for whatever he has for me. I want to be clay in His hands, but there always days when I don't want to go to the hard places where change takes place. I have to choose everyday that I will keep pressing on towards what the Lord has for me!